I feel like every single time I write these post it is all about how fast time is flying. I feel like it was yesterday when it was getting closer to me having to go back to work I literally had a breakdown, if I would’ve known then that it was the “baby blues”. I wouldn’t have felt so bad about being in that emotional space .Read More
These past couple of weeks I have had less time to play with make up or get dressed up and take pictures of myself, so this weeks blog post have been more of the emotional side of things.
I am still trying to figure out what works for me with this blog and what doesn't. If you have opinions on the matter I am open to hear about them.
If you read my post earlier this week you are well aware that Mother's Day didn't go as smoothly as one would hope. You can read more of it here.Read More
Read this before continuing.
You don't know where someone's been until you walk in their shoes, this is your journey deal with it.
You'll never appreciate anything you never worked hard for.
So hustle hard and give yourself a little credit love, for the journey you made thus far probably wasn't without road blocks, you'll get there.
Life has been super hectic for me lately, I was hoping that when I kicked my full time to the curb I would have more time for the simple things but that is totally not happening.
I have the crazy tedious way about life, I like to do things a certain way and when that way is changed it messes me up. And I feel like I'm in a crash and burn situation.
For me personally not being able to do it all kind of sucks because that's the person I am. If I don't do it myself it won't get done type of attitude, it's a problem of mine like OCD, I guess?
I have totally been envying the success of others, I am happy for them honestly it's crazy some of the success that some people have but I wish I had it too.
I know I can only blame myself, I have changed the name of my blog so many times I can barely keep up. How the hell can anyone else?
I have been pushing myself to the max and honestly I need a fucking break. I need a little tequila [maybe a lot] and a bunch of rest.
It just makes me feel super guilty to drop J anywhere already. I mean we wanted him for so long, prayed for him so hard and I feel obligated to be there for him besides just being his mother. Like I got my miracle but there are so many out there still waiting and praying.
I feel like I should be able to handle it all, I should be all organized and I should have all these pretty post prepared but I don't, I don't have my shit together. And it is annoying the fuck out of me.
I want to be organized, I want to get shit done.
A friend recently told me to stop saying and start doing, and my doing is not happening and it hasn't for quite sometime.
I don't want to be perfect, I just need something to get done. I need weekly post to be prepared to where I have time to read over them, instead of throwing something on this blog crossing my fingers and hoping people read it.
I need dinner to get cooked so we aren't eating crap every day, I need to fit in some type of working out in preferably at home because I hate being away from a J and gyms for that matter.
We moved into our house last year and I have yet to use our bath tub, it sucks. I finally have a tub of my own and I still haven't used it and we'll be here a year at the end of August.
I want to have one of those moments with the pretty rose petals, candles and maybe the possibility of dozing off. But I guess instead of perfect I just need done.
It seems like when you get older these things have to be scheduled into life, regardless of if you are a SAHM, Entrepreneur, or all of the above and in between.
I'm not complaining but I need something to keep myself accountable, I need to get shit done and I need to do it now.
But always remember this we as humans have a tendency to compare ourselves to others without knowing their journey and feeling like we deserve something without the hustle.
Don't compare yourself to others it is a shit storm you can avoid.
I promised better pictures so my hubby has been taking some of my photos lately and even though they aren't the most instagram worthy photos, they are my favorite. I mean where can you get quality like this guys?
This is me asking him "Is my head is straight?" 🙄, and him snapping away. Of course.
If you read my Girrl Scout post last week this is the shirt I picked up from that haul and I love it, definitely visit her site.
I was so glad when my bestie text me that she was coming into town because the last time I saw her in person we were both exhausted with newborn babies. I could barely move and they stayed across town but this weekend her family stayed with my family and it was nice to have a house full of people. I almost always never get photos of us while she is here because we are always just doing and we always forget to get pictures of us. : \
They arrived in town on Friday night and we were exhausted from work, so we ordered pizza, relaxed and just chatted for a while. Saturday she had a baptism to attend which I tagged along to because isn't that what best friends are for, lol. Then Sunday we headed to get crawfish at The Crawfish Shack in Crosby if you haven't tried it, it is a definite must.
A couple of weekends ago, I went with my other friend to RA sushi and I was so in love with this Mango Margarita they served, so we attempted to recreate it at home. I'd say it was a success but I could've used some more Tequila. : D
It is official, the countdown has begun.
I haven't announced it but I put my two week notice in at my job on March 17 and I couldn't be more ready to quit something in my life.
Don't get me wrong, I liked my job but I didn't love it and it was time to make some changes.
I know to some of you especially those who may read this that actually worked with me would beg to differ. I know. When I first started a lot of people didn't even know I existed I was really, really quiet.
For me it was never the actual job or the people I worked with, I kind of enjoyed having a "family" of sorts up here. It was very much so a work harder not smarter environment and I don't work that way.
After spending so many years trying for J, when he finally arrived you can imagine how hard it was for me to even think about leaving him to return to this place. With him in good hands, it was easier to leave him than I imagined but it wasn't worth it. I missed him and I knew eventually I would find any reason to not come to work.
There were days I would tell E I am not sure I want to put in my notice. I wasn't sure if staying home was for me, I have only spent a few months at a time not working since I was 15. We just bought a house last year and not having the security of a second income was freaking me the fuck out, to be honest. And still is.
But it is time to let go, move on and be home with my little love.
So today the count down begins. Let's do this.